Thursday, December 4, 2014

Top All-Time One Of My Favorite Parenting Epiphanies


I’ve done a lot FOR those little tomfoolery-filled ragamuffins.  I feed them vegetables, and soap their germs, make sure their clothes match when going to church, and generally help them avoid things that will maime them or cause certain death.  I’ve read about a thousand books out loud to them, made sure they’ve got plenty of Bible verses in their hearts, and taught them enough grammar and spelling rules that they have passed my skill level.  I cut their hair, smear cream on their rashes, and tell them to drink water when they say they have a headache.

Man alive.  I am a saint.  So many duties, dude.  So much, I do, FOR those sweet littles of mine. 


I know they are grateful.  They say I’m “the best mom in the world” after most discoveries of what’s for dinner.  They put their clean clothes on and wrap up warm in their clean beds with happy hearts.  They feel safe and loved in all that their mom does FOR THEM.

I know they will remember most of that even when they are grown.  I know they will think “how did mom do this” when they are faced with the same challenge…or they’ll probably just ask Siri.

Yet…they still want more from me. 

Tarnation.  After all I do FOR THEM. 

What more can they want?

It dawned on me a couple years into this adventure what that might be.

They love, love, love the WITH part.

They want me to be WITH THEM.

(This is not a you-are-a-terrible-mom-because-you-don’t-homeschool guilt trip.  I get very irratated when moms push their familiy’s personal convictions and callings onto other women as if it’s the higher spirtual road.  I actually want to walk up to those women and throw pie in their faces.  We good now? Okay.)

Yes, yes, I know they can’t do everything WITH me.  Even they know that.

Time WITH ME is the love language of my children. 

“Will you play Legos WITH me, Mama?”
“Will you sit WITH me while I draw, Mama?”
“Can I go WITH you on your run, Mama?”
“Can I go WITH you to the store, Mama?”
"Can you play piano WITH me even though you're not that great at it, Mama?"

I feel like I’m so cranky half the time that I have no idea why they want to be WITH me, but they really do!

I know you have a lot to do FOR THEM and honestly the day will come for you young moms that your kids can do a lot of those chores along side you so you don’t feel like you always need to run off and leave them in front of the toys or tv.

My dear sisters…

They will remember the WITH times far more than the FOR times.  The FOR THEMS are a must.  Nobody likes wearing dirty underwear.  The WITH THEMS are where the real treasure lies. 

I have found a couple of things that I have decided to turn into WITH THEMS instead of run off and turn them into ESCAPING FROM THEMS…oh I mean FOR THEMS.

Like I keep saying, I’m old now and you have to listen to me.

Have fun with the WITHS.

1 comment:

  1. Yep. Even doing dishes and making beds becomes less chore-like when we do it with them. Plus, in perspective, our time with them is so terribly, sadly, short. (Said as she weans her 6th baby. Waaah!)